Why LOTR Sucks: One Dick To Rule Them All

Or is that one ring?

Lord Denethor is supposed to be a huge dick. He’s one of the biggest dicks in the whole series. But because Peter Jackson felt the need to turn everyone else into a dick, his impact is greatly lessened. He’s just one more dick in a long line of dicks, what with Elrond, Theoden, Faramir, and the expanded role for Saruman.

That is, as they say, far too many dicks.

Minutes Watched: 3.1:15.32

Number of Montages: 16

Number of slow motion close-ups of people crying: 53

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