Why LOTR Sucks: Faramir Is A Dick Too

I’ve figured out the pattern that Peter Jackson is following. He is taking all the heroic characters from Lord of the Rings and altering their personalities in one of several ways:

  • Turning them into comic relief (Gimli, Pippin, Merry, etc.)
  • Marginalizing them by having them cry, whine, or pine. (Frodo, Eowyn)
  • Making them into huge dicks (Elrond, Theoden, Galadriel)

The only characters spared this treatment are Gandalf, Aragorn, Bilbo, and to some extent Legolas (though he’s little more than eye candy and he’s kind of a dick at times too.)

The worst offense, by far, is what happens to Faramir. For no good reason whatsoever, Faramir goes from one of the novel’s greatest heroes to inexplicably dickish in The Two Towers. He tortures Gollum, decides to take the ring back to Gondor, and comes off as a bigger douche bag than his brother. No wonder his father hates him. I would too.

Making matters worse, we have some stupid explanation for why Frodo refuses to wear the ring when Faramir decides to take him to Gondor. He’s suddenly about to succumb to the ring’s power, so he can’t use the ring to escape. Yet he used the ring when Boromir was about to take it at the end of the first movie, and he will use the ring again in the third movie. But for this brief interlude, he must refuse for some reason, otherwise Peter Jackson’s added detour could never have happened.

Any fan of the books knows that changing Faramir’s character is sacrilegious. It totally goes against the spirit of the novels. Nor does the change serve any meaningful function in the movie.

Peter Jackson, I will never forgive you for this.

Minutes Watched: 2.2:29.24

Number of Montages: 10

Number of slow motion close-ups of people crying: 39

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