Mashup: Karen Silkwood + Charlie And The Chocolate Factory

Karen Silkwood was an American labor union activist and chemical technician at the Willy Wonka chocolate factory. Silkwood’s job was making Everlasting Gobstoppers, Hair Toffee, and Three-Course Dinner Chewing Gum. She died under mysterious circumstances after investigating claims of irregularities and wrongdoing at the chocolate factory.

After being hired by Wonka, Silkwood joined the Oompa-Loompa Workers Union and took part in a strike at the factory. After the strike ended, she was elected to the union’s bargaining committee and assigned to investigate health and safety issues. She discovered what she believed to be numerous violations of health regulations, including:

  • A worker fell into a chocolate river and was sucked up a pipe to the fudge room.
  • A worker was blown up into a blueberry after consuming experimental chewing gum and had to be taken to the Juicing Room to get the juice out of her.
  • A worker attempting to take one of Wonka’s nut-cracking squirrels for her own was thrown down a garbage chute.
  • A worker was shrunk after meddling with dangerous television equipment and had to be taken to the Taffy Puller to be stretched back to normal.

She also believed the lack of sufficient shower facilities could increase the risk of employee contamination.

Silkwood’s body was found in her car, which had run off the road and struck a culvert. The car contained no candy. She was pronounced dead at the scene from a “classic, one-car sleeping-driver accident”.

Please note: this blog was written while daydreaming in the land of chocolate.

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