Posts Tagged: Samwise Gamgee

Film/Video — No Comments
11
Feb 12

Why LOTR Sucks: Seriously?

What were women and children still doing in the outer ring of Gondor with the Orcs attacking? Wouldn’t someone have thought to move them to safety BEFORE the wall was breached? Does Sam have to do everything? I mean, he’s a little busy killing spiders and saving the world.

Minutes Watched: 3.2:30.50

Number of Montages: 17

Number of slow motion close-ups of people crying: 67

Start at the beginning

Film/Video — 1 Comment
11
Feb 12

Why LOTR Sucks: Now We’re Talking

Frodo gets stung by Shelob, and Sam saves the day. I’m still not sure why they had to argue and Sam had to head home, but whatever. Peter Jackson just crammed six close ups of Sam crying into about 30 seconds of film.

I don’t mean to quibble, because I really hope we get to hundred in the next two hours(!!!!!) but I understand why we have so many close ups. He’s filming people from multiple perspectives, some of normal height, some at hobbit height, some somewhere in between. Every time you film them together, it costs a lot of money and time for the special effects. But when two hobbits are talking, or two people, you don’t need to rely on close ups the whole time.

I guess Peter Jackson is trying to be consistent.*

Minutes Watched: 3.2:16.30

Number of Montages: 17

Number of slow motion close-ups of people crying: 67

Start at the beginning

*Consistently bad

Film/Video — No Comments
11
Feb 12

Why LOTR Sucks: So So Awful

Every time Peter Jackson changes the story to fit his vision of what the Lord of the Rings should be, it leads to unforeseen consequences down the line. When Sam was ordered away by Frodo (never happened in the book) I assumed he would just follow behind because that’s who Sam is. He is completely loyal to Frodo and would never abandon him. Sam knows that the ring is warping Frodo’s mind.

But Peter Jackson decides Sam isn’t all that loyal after all. Sam starts climbing down the steps, heading back to the Shire I suppose. Then he slips and falls, coming to a stop right next to the lembas bread that Gollum threw over the cliff. What a brilliant coincidence, Peter Jackson! I bet Tolkien wishes he had thought of it himself. I’m sure that one will haunt him for the rest of eternity.

Seeing the bread reminds him of what a twat Gollum is, and Sam turns around, probably out of a sense of revenge. Because, you know, he isn’t loyal.

The scene does afford us three more slow motion close ups of hobbits crying, so I count the whole episode as a push.

Minutes Watched: 3.2:16.30

Number of Montages: 17

Number of slow motion close-ups of people crying: 61

Start at the beginning

Film/Video — No Comments
7
Feb 12

Why LOTR Sucks: Leave Well Enough Alone

What possessed Peter Jackson to think he could write a better story than J.R.R. Tolkien? I suppose he thought he was being cinematic, but there’s nothing about Frodo sending Sam away that makes it a better story than Tolkien’s. Just because people are yelling at each other doesn’t make it dramatic. Having Gollum try to turn Frodo and Sam against each other isn’t original. It’s funny to think that an adaptation of a novel could be derivative, but Peter Jackson manages it. He robs from Star Wars. He robs from Shakespeare. He robs from B movies.

I guess he needed an excuse here to fit in some slow motion tears.

Minutes Watched: 3.1:29.10

Number of Montages: 16

Number of slow motion close-ups of people crying: 54

Start at the beginning

Film/Video — No Comments
4
Feb 12

Why LOTR Sucks: Faramir To Frodo: Just Kidding

Sam gives a speech, with a montage in the background, and everyone cries (often in slow motion). Even Gollum. The speech is enough to make Faramir change his mind and let Frodo go. This is, of course, just after seeing Frodo try and give the ring to the black rider.

That has to be the saddest part about changing Faramir’s character. The exact moment when he would actually be justified in taking the ring from Frodo is the moment when he stops being a dick and lets them go on their merry way.

Minutes Watched: 2.3:24.45

Number of Montages: 13

Number of slow motion close-ups of people crying: 50

Start at the beginning

Film/Video — 1 Comment
28
Jan 12

Why LOTR Sucks: Oliphants

Sam always wanted to see Oliphants, and it’s nice for us to see them too. And here comes Faramir. I always liked Faramir. Everyone likes Faramir. I’m sure that you can ask most fans of the books and they’ll list Faramir among their favorite characters. The movie’s really going to get good, now that Faramir has arrived.

I’m officially at the halfway point. It’s taken me several days, and I have to go back to work on Monday. I may never finish. Pray for me to find the strength to continue.

Minutes Watched: 2.1:45.15

Number of Montages: 9

Number of slow motion close-ups of people crying: 31

Start at the beginning

Film/Video — No Comments
27
Jan 12

Why LOTR Sucks: Rudy Was A Hero At Notre Dame And He’s A Hero In Middle Earth

So Sam is drowning, several feet under the water, maybe even yards. In slow motion of course. It’s a scene we’ve seen a thousand times before. And then he’s rescued by Frodo. No surprise there.

Except Frodo is still sitting in the boat. Somehow he reached from his canoe with his stubby little hobbit arm and reached a completely submerged Sam. The ring must turn its bearer into Mr. Fantastic.

We also got two more slow motion close-ups of Frodo crying.

We’re so close to the end of movie one. I’m really hoping not to have to write anything else until The Two Towers.

Minutes Watched: 3:17.01

Number of Montages: 7

Number of slow motion close-ups of people crying: 28

Start at the beginning

Film/Video — No Comments
25
Jan 12

A Tricky Problem

Adapting a beloved novel is always going to be difficult. One with as much backstory and history as Tolkien puts in his works might seem nearly impossible to satisfactorily condense into three hours.

As an example, in the book, Bilbo leave Frodo the ring and leaves the Shire. Gandalf warns him to keep it safe. Then many years pass. The novel informs us that time as passed, and explains what has happened in the interim, but not much story happens. Then Gandalf comes back and determines that it is indeed the one true ring, and warns Frodo that he must take the ring to Rivendell. How does a filmmaker deal with this elapsed time, and make it work in a movie?

It seems to me there are two possible solutions. And then there’s the way Peter Jackson handles it.

Solution #1: Condense the two meetings into one. Bilbo leaves Frodo the ring, and Gandalf immediately warns him of danger. The ring needs to be taken away, but Gandalf doesn’t have the time to do it. With this one, you probably have Bilbo leave Sting and the elf mail at the same time, and we would never see him at Rivendell. It’s a shame to marginalize Bilbo even more, but it saves time, and people that haven’t read the books have no attachment to Bilbo anyway. Tough choices have to be made sometime, and this will save considerable time.

Solution #2: Create a buffer between when Bilbo gives up the ring, and Gandalf comes back to warn him. Make it clear a great deal of time has passed. Move the introductions of Merry and Pippin (and possibly Sam) to here, and shorten the introduction to the Shire. This stays truer to the book and would be about the same length. You’d have the change to build up some suspense for Gandalf’s return and the growing threat of Mordor.

Peter Jackson’s ‘Solution:’ Have Gandalf leave, look at a book. Immediately come back. You haven’t established any time has passed, Gandalf’s departure allows him to learn information we’ve already been informed of twice already, and the introduction of the Black Riders is handled clumsily and does a bad job of creating suspense. This could have easily been handled more effectively. The movie has begun to devolve.

Added bonus: we get our first montage of people walking through beautiful New Zealand scenery.

Minutes Watched: 44.14

Number of Montages: 3

Start at the beginning

Film/Video — No Comments
25
Jan 12

Why LOTR Sucks: Wishing For The Hobbit

I still wish they had made The Hobbit first, because that’s the proper order of things (this isn’t Star Wars after all), but I like the various allusions to the Hobbit that are thrown in. These are the touches meant for the lovers of the book, and hopefully don’t detract from the story for people who haven’t read them (There are plenty of detractions coming up, anyway). And again, seeing how The Hobbit is my favorite, we’ll just hope Jackson has learned from all his mistakes. We also have just gotten our introduction to Sam, and our first glimpses of Pippin and Merry. They definitely look like hobbits.

Minutes Watched: 21.28

Number of Montages: 2

Start at the beginning

Optimized by SEO Ultimate